IDENTITY

FIRST....

Write down 5 words that describe who you are.

Write down 3 character traits/issues that you would like to see changed.

--->How is our identity formed?

Proverbs 27:21..."a man is valued by what others say of him."

UNDERSTANDING THE CYCLE:

How you view yourself affects how you interact others, which affects how others view you, which affects how others interact with you.

You are projecting to everyone what you think about yourself, which shapes how they view you.

Are you satisfied with the identity you bring to the table today?

God has a solution.

"If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." John 8:31-32

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters." Romans 8:28-29

Truth: It doesn't matter what others think of you, it matters what God thinks.

Through prayer, God's word, and reflection, I know how God views me, and in turn, that is how I view myself.

The only identity worth having is how God views me--that is how I should view myself.

Depression=overinflated self esteem--"no one cares about me as much as I care about myself"

The world has a twisted view of identity--that we need self esteem, which is only focused on ourselves and how to love ourselves better, but God never told us to love ourselves--we already do. He told us to love others.

God esteem (v.) : esteeming others above ourselves--this is where the real meaning of esteem comes from.

The world's view: "I pretend to be someone I'm not so you'll treat me better than I deserve--I'm looking for acceptance and affirmation from others and then I will feel better about myself."

Biblical way=understand who God created me to be so I'll seek to reinforce the best in YOU because I'm looking to GIVE acceptance and affirmation.

-Because of who I understand myself to be in God's perspective, I will reinforce the best in you because I am a person who seeks to GIVE affirmation and acceptance and I am EMPOWERED by the holy spirit to love you more than anyone has loved you before.

World's perspective=culture defines you and you are constantly adapting to the culture.

God's perspective= YOU change the world

Something to really think about:

**Are you changing your relationships, or are they changing you? Are you changing the world, or is it changing you?

"So from now on, we regard no one from a worldly point of view. Though we once regarded Christ in this way, we do so no longer. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: THE OLD IS GONE, THE NEW IS HERE!" 2 Corinthians 5:16

-Most people who become Christians only make slight modifications, but Paul says if you are IN Christ, ALL things are made NEW.

Are you living a worldly identity?

Is the world your stimulus instead of the truth of God's word?

"Out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks" Matthew 12:34

"When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reckoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me." 1 Corinthians 13:11

-->A baby's cry illicits negative emotions that you want to alleviate.

-God designed it so parents would be leveraged beyond themselves to help a child (b/c of our selfish nature)

- A child acts with no concern for other people, but only for themselves.

-Children's first words: "no", "mine"

-They view themselves as being incapable, they need someone to do everything for them

-They become anxious, frustrated, discouraged, angry when those needs are not met

-"Reckon"-to consider something to be a reality

-Child's concept of reality: "I am a victim of my circumstances, therefore its not my responsibility or my fault"

**Have you embraced adulthood yet in Christ?

-You are to be a responsible, mature adult in your faith.

- Are you communicating as a spiritual adult, developing identity as so, and acting as someone who is spiritually mature?

Take responsibility for your attitudes and actions.

YOU CHOOSE your attitude. Are you taking responsibility for it, or are you still perceiving reality as a child?

-->Is your spiritual life fully dependent on the quality of caretakers around you, or do you know how to feed yourself?

-Is it based on the quality of a sermon, or quality of a bible study your leader comes up with?

-We are always looking to "get" something out of church or worship--we go to church not to get, but to GIVE--to love others.

-Don't leverage people with negative emotions.

-Our attitudes are chosen based on how they will leverage people--so I can get people to treat me better than they would (ex: That pizza better be ready in 5 minutes or it's free)

-Put away this kind of childish communication.

-Put away the infant, take responsibility for yourself and use DIRECT and POSITIVE communication instead of guilt trips and silence.

Learn to communicate DIRECTLY.

Use...Will you, May I....

Instead of trying to manipulate

-"will you?" asks permission of another person

-"may I?" asks permission for you to take action

Stop thinking of yourself as a child, as incapable.

"I can do ALL things through Christ" Philippians

--We say "I can't forgive that person, I could never get over that, I could never do that.." But the answer is... I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST JESUS

**Move from being dependent to being responsible.

Take an adult response to life--labor night and day as the disciples did..."surely you remember, brothers and sisters, our toil and hardship; WE WORKED NIGHT AND DAY in order not to be a burden to anyone while we preached the gospel of God to you." 1 Thess 2:9

-->change from seeing ourselves as helpless to proactively seeking wise solutions.

"If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you." James 1:5

ASK for wisdom.

Wisdom= the ABILITY to see and the INCLINATION to CHOOSE the best and highest goal together with the surest means of attaining it.

-The very fact that God offers you wisdom is PROOF that you are to be RESPONSIBLE.

**You will be a deliverer for others and your life will be guarded when you seek wisdom from God.

Are other people in control of your well-being? (ex: Do you have lack of a significant other that is making you miserable?) --ONLY put your well-being in the hands of God.

"REJOICE in the Lord ALWAYS. I will say it again, REJOICE!" Phil 4:4

--Is satisfaction and contentment a dream you are chasing, or a choice you are making?

--If you are choosing to think of life from a negative, self-focused perspective and will be bummed and not see anything.

In what way are you currently communicating in a childish way? (Leveraging and acting out in order to get others to change?)

What needs are you currently seeking for someone else to meet?

In what areas of your life are you COPING with reality instead of CHANGING reality?

-the only reality God has given you to change is YOURSELF. It is YOUR own choice.

SO...

Change your perception on what you know to be real.

Recognize that you don't have to be a child anymore and people will start to view you differently because you are acting differently.

Attributes of God- #1: Love

God loves me!

How many verses do you honestly know by heart about how God loves you?

This was totally eye opening for me because I couldn't think of very many. I know that God loves me, but God showed today how important it is to have those written on my heart, to know the depths of his love for me. How can I be completely transformed by his love if I don't know his love by what he says in his word?

Here are some verses of God's love for us:

Deuteronomy 10:15, Isaiah 63:9, Jeremiah 31:3, Hosea 3:1, Hosea 11:4, Zephaniah 3: 17, John 3:16, Romans 5:5, Romans 5:8, 8:35, 2 Corinth 5:14, Ephesians 2:4, 3, 5:2, Titus 3:4, 1 John 3:1, 1 John 4:8-10, 1 Corinth 3

Now seriously think about and soak in all of these statements about God's love and grace for us:

God loves you so much, he would rather die than be without you.

He loves you with an unmeasurable force--there is nothing that can separate you from his love because nothing is stronger than him and he doesn't withhold any of his love for you.

Love is patient-->God is willing to suffer long

Love is kind--> kindness=doing something nice with no strings attached--> it does not envy and doesn't feel bad for what someone else has. God is excited and enthusiastic in his love--his desire is that your life would go better than you deserve.

Love does not boast-->God, in his love is humble. HE is the focus of everything, but in his love, he doesn't punish you for being focused on yourself.

Love is not rude-->God will never force you to do anything you don't want to do --we have a misunderstanding of God in that we think he'll force us to do all these things we don't want to

Love is not self-seeking-->God is not looking to get anything from you, he's trying to GIVE to you today, ALL the goodness he has to give.

Love is not easily provoked or angered-->you can't push God's buttons-he is not mad at you today---he poured out all his wrath on his son Jesus Christ

Every experience of pleasure on earth is tainted with death, but every experience in God's presence is perfect. Sin distracts the very nature of who God is--God is extremely mad at sin, if God was mad at you, you wouldn't be here.

God loves you enough to take all of that wrath in your place.

Because God loves us, his actions towards us are gracious.

In his love, he chooses to give us grace. He loves us because he sovereignly chooses to, even when there is NO righteousness in us.

In our culture, we only love the people that love us--> if we have patience, we will have people in our lives that try our patience. If we are kind, we will love people who don't do anything for us.

We only love ourselves, so we only surround ourselves with people that love us. Do the people that surround you even ask for any love from you? Example of broken marriages= our culture says: when you actually require things that make me love you (patience, kindness, gentleness, humbleness), I don't want to be married to you.

It is in God's nature to love us and he chooses to love us.

GRACE is the sovereign saving love of our heavenly father exercised with omnipotent power inspite of his perfect understanding of us.

God chooses to bless us even though we deserve hell. He never demands any compensation for blessing you.

Grace cannot be won, bought, or earned. Grace is something that God gives--it is a gift, not a right.

Righteousness occurs when you frequent from the well of grace and draw from it everyday.

His grace is experienced through my relationship with him.

What is the result of grace?

-->we are saved, justified, sufficient in all things, it changes the paradigm we live life from. A person who is lacking is seeking to GET, those who have abundance are seeking to GIVE--I am God's gift to the world because of Christ in me, the hope of glory.

We should be looking to bless everyone we come in contact with if we are people of grace and should be excited because we are going to bless someone.

If I have an abundant life, I would give. It's a state of distributing, not receiving.

Has God's grace become a reality in your life, or are you not convinced that God loves you that much--are you producing the fruits of the spirit? Are you acting in love? (peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, self-control, humility?)

Love is supposed to be something LIVED.

As a result of his love pouring out on me, I should in turn, love others.

"If I don't love my brother whom I have seen, how can I love God whom I have not seen?"

If someone jumped in the ocean, what would be the proof---? A: they would be wet.

If someone says God loves me. What would be the proof?--That person should love.

God loves us excessively, extravagantly, omnipotently, recklessly. He loves us with absolute, complete abandonment.

If I am loved by God, it is going to have a profound impact on how I live my life.

RESPONSES OF GRACE:

1) Humility=it should humble me that God loves me so much

2)Trust--I should trust him--why would God withhold any good thing from you?

Grace keeps me rooted in today and keeps me worrying about tomorrow. Learn to engage God in the present, take one day at a time because TODAY is where God meets you.

3)It should cause me to participate with him, to take action. Inactivity is a rejection of grace. Are you taking advantage of your 24 hours everyday of grace? We work because we have grace, not to receive it-- I work in ministry because I understand that God is gracious and as I step out in faith, he will do above and abundantly beyond all I could ever ask or imagine.

4)Contentment--our culture has taught us how to abound. We have substituted materialism for pure joy. George Clerie's hope for us is that we all become dirt poor and in that state are able to say "God, you are enough."

Do you love this world more, or do you love God more?

Mordecai's challenge to Esther:

" If you remain silent at this time, be assured deliverance will come through another person." Even if Esther didn't act, Mordecai knew the character of God and knew he would use someone else who was willing to engage. If you will engage God, you will find his favor in it.

Don't see his favor as an opportunity for your flesh, but an opportunity to bless others.

What if you shifted your paradigm and believed that success is built on what you give, rather on what you get?

Worship meeting homework: Write 100 attributes of God.--This is such an exciting assignment because I have been thinking of attributes of God all day. They have been popping up in my head all day and it is such an amazing thing to dwell on--what human can you state 100 attributes about, or even 15? The attributes of God are immeasurable! I will share the list when I finish!